Simple Things
This week we received a screening email from OA&FS. The first in about two months. Since it was the first one in a while, we were excited to notice it on Wednesday night.
I try to keep things in perspective regarding this process. I look at each adoption screening as an opportunity to become better prepared for the challenges that come with expecting a baby and eventually being a parent, and not necessarily as The Call.
Having said that, I need to be available should something really important come through. Every time I get correspondence from an adoption worker, I use a feature in my email account that allows me to designate them as a VIP. From them on whenever they contact me, a special ring tone plays that lets me know I'm getting an email that I can't ignore.
To some, this might seem like a simple thing. If you aren't tech savvy, such small details made a big difference. So I am grateful that I can by this time count on knowing for sure when these opportunities arise.
The screening was for a baby girl who had been born the day before, as with a lot of these screenings, there were special considerations present. After discussing the details, we agreed to ask that our profile be presented to the mom for a possible match.
That was several days ago. Since we haven't heard back yet, we are assuming that Mom chose a different situation. On one level, it is always disappointing, yet it wasn't an ideal situation to begin with. It is also a relief of sorts to console ourselves with the idea that maybe our match won't have to be such a challenge.
I'm choosing to remain vague about the details because I realize that some day I may choose to write about a possible match and it could indeed happen. I want this blog to be a frank portrayal of our journey to parenthood as gay men, yet I also intend to be respectful of everyone involved.
On that note, I wanted to mention that I also chose to step way back from social media this week. Considering everything in the news, I found myself using Facebook especially as a soapbox. And frequently losing perspective of the impact my words have on other people.
So I made the decision to use Facebook primarily as a way to ensure that my friends and family can contact me, especially if they can't text me. As a parent, I want to teach my children that the people in front of them are more important than the people in things.
One way I will utilize Facebook and update others is by hopefully linking my posts to my feed. I have in the past enjoyed the anonymous nature of this blog. It is easy to say what I have on my mind if I think there are no consequences to my words! But I am looking forward to using this as a way to connect rather than stay isolated.
I try to keep things in perspective regarding this process. I look at each adoption screening as an opportunity to become better prepared for the challenges that come with expecting a baby and eventually being a parent, and not necessarily as The Call.
Having said that, I need to be available should something really important come through. Every time I get correspondence from an adoption worker, I use a feature in my email account that allows me to designate them as a VIP. From them on whenever they contact me, a special ring tone plays that lets me know I'm getting an email that I can't ignore.
To some, this might seem like a simple thing. If you aren't tech savvy, such small details made a big difference. So I am grateful that I can by this time count on knowing for sure when these opportunities arise.
The screening was for a baby girl who had been born the day before, as with a lot of these screenings, there were special considerations present. After discussing the details, we agreed to ask that our profile be presented to the mom for a possible match.
That was several days ago. Since we haven't heard back yet, we are assuming that Mom chose a different situation. On one level, it is always disappointing, yet it wasn't an ideal situation to begin with. It is also a relief of sorts to console ourselves with the idea that maybe our match won't have to be such a challenge.
I'm choosing to remain vague about the details because I realize that some day I may choose to write about a possible match and it could indeed happen. I want this blog to be a frank portrayal of our journey to parenthood as gay men, yet I also intend to be respectful of everyone involved.
On that note, I wanted to mention that I also chose to step way back from social media this week. Considering everything in the news, I found myself using Facebook especially as a soapbox. And frequently losing perspective of the impact my words have on other people.
So I made the decision to use Facebook primarily as a way to ensure that my friends and family can contact me, especially if they can't text me. As a parent, I want to teach my children that the people in front of them are more important than the people in things.
One way I will utilize Facebook and update others is by hopefully linking my posts to my feed. I have in the past enjoyed the anonymous nature of this blog. It is easy to say what I have on my mind if I think there are no consequences to my words! But I am looking forward to using this as a way to connect rather than stay isolated.
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